Mass Mobile Dependency

I saw an add for the Nexus One today, and it really got me thinking about how deeply routed mobile phones are in our lives.  It's more than just calling your friends and making business calls these days,  people constantly are wired to the Web transmitting details of their every action.   What if all mobile phones just disappeared into thin air?
If all mobile phones were to just vanish into oblivion for one day, there would be severe casualties in the business world.   I also think that some of our more mobile dependent faction would become overly depressed, and there would possibly be mass suicides.  This is where my point is coming to.  Are we too dependent on cell phones in this day and age?  I can realize that they are very handy tools with countless, useful daily applications to our lives, but are they more than just a tool?  I feel that my girl friend completes me and that makes me happy, but I think some people wouldn't be complete with out their cell phones.  Let's think about it people.  Stay fit and stay classy America.    

Don't Be Bill, Be Healthy!

Now, I know this may seem like another person pounding the importance of health into the unresponsive brains of the ever heftier American population, but let's talk about the pros of eating right and regular exercise.  What brought this to my mind, is the apparent media explosion covering our former president, Bill Clinton's, recent heart surgery.

When reading these headlines and seeing photos of Bill everywhere, I was overcome with a feeling of nostalgia.  It brought me back to the times when Bill was reigning America, when I was just a child.  One memory that I recalled, was reading this children's book of fun facts about all of the presidents and the favorite meal of every president was listed.   I don't recall exactly what the book said about Bill, but it was something along these lines, "President Clinton loves good fast food, when given the choice between a salad and a burger with fries and all of the trimmings, President Clinton can't resist the burger and fries."   Hmmmm,  does that seem like there might be a connection there?  Maybe, that wasn't the right choice and that shit was toxic and it fucked up your arteries Bill.   Hey, it's okay though, because after eight years, you're back in the lime light rather than your wife.    Enjoy your fast fame.

The bottom line here, we need to start eating better.  It's not that there is no awareness.  Believe me, we've heard that we need to eat our veggies for the past ten generations.   I challenge everyone out there to eat a vegetable or fruit the next time you feel like poisoning your body with one of our county's many, infamous, grease-packed,  and fast food options.   I also challenge you to do some physical exercise, not a whole workout, just some.  It can be just ten push ups whenever you find yourself with a free minute during the day.  This isn't hard people.  Trust me, the benefits of leading a healthy lifestyle far outweigh any hassle it causes.    Stay classy and stay fit America.

What the doodle?

Due to my mother's obsession with poodles and her planning (for the past three years) to purchase a poodle, I have become familiar with such odd dog breeds as the Labradoodle and the Golden Doodle.  It's funny that when I type the word Labradoodle, it's underlined with the red, squiggled line of death which indicates a misspelling quite obviously because the breed is so new and is not yet official.  This breed is becoming so popular that when I type it into Google, I come up with tons of options, such as Labradoodle rescues and specific grooming instructions.   Is this a new fad, mixing two, all American sporting breeds, Golden Retrievers and Labrador Retrievers with the very effeminate image of the Poodle?  Is this just a cash cow stumbled upon by breeders who realize people will gladly chuck down seven hundred dollars for a Golden Doodle?  

Or, does it go much deeper than that, into the heart of our society and our America?  Is it a sign of Americans becoming more inclined to calm and pretty?   What happened to Americans who wanted brave, wild, beautifully strong, and hard-working dogs to accompany them in their quest to fulfill their American dream and conquering the vistas and prairies of our land?  Is this a sign that Americans are becoming calm and complacent and losing their spunk and vigor?  Are we becoming like the French, whom standardized the Poodle?  Americans, are sitting at home and writing blogs, eating pizza rolls, checking their Facebook, and watching Jersey Shore.  They need a dog that will fit their image, they need a Labradoodle.   I, however, want to roam America's beautiful forests, to boat upon America's lakes and rivers, to experience America the beautiful, and I sure as hell don't want to do it with a dog called a doodle.  It's not the dog, it's the name and the fact that it is so appealing to many Americans that disgusts me and makes me wonder about our precious America.  

The Middle Finger Slinger

Alright, I had what I thought was an amazing topic to cover today, the middle finger.   Sadly, there is just such a mountain of information already written on the topic of the middle finger that I’d feel like I was making the internet a very redundant place.  So, instead of regurgitating information I will write one quick paragraph stating my own opinion on the middle finger and then I’ll provide a few links to amazingly informative websites such as themiddlefinger.com, which ironically wasn’t very informative, but the name is priceless.

Here is my piece on the glorious middle finger, every true American/bad ass’s favorite sign language.    It’s applicable to almost any situation where you feel the need to do something bad ass.  Sometimes it may be looked upon as immature or dumb, but I’d say that the pros far outweigh the cons here and I’m going to give you guys some true life scenarios where you come out on top just by using the middle finger.   You come in to class and find out that you failed your final, it’s the last day of school and you know you’re just really fucked, so just flick off the teacher and throw some books, go out with a bang if you know what I mean.   You’re still failing but at least you’ll have felt a little bad ass.  Some might even say, that feeling is priceless; it’s a high you can’t buy.   Okay, you’re at the grocery store and you find out that you’re one cent short, and ask the checker to give you a break, he doesn’t and you’re still screwed and embarrassed at least you can flick that guy off.   In this situation you may possibly be more embarrassed depending upon your tolerance for such things, also do not do this if the checker is bigger than you or if you are Mormon.  It’s not that there’s anything wrong with being Mormon, you just shouldn’t be a naughty Mormon.    In conclusion, there are a million and one things to say about the middle finger, it’s applicable to almost every situation and almost universally recognized.   So, here is my challenge to all of you.  Go out and flick of anyone and everyone, don’t think, just shoot the bird!
Link Time:
The Ooze, Finger Page: This website has so much middle finger knowledge that it will blow your brain, I’m not sure but I think they release some sort of middle finger periodical.  Just go check it out.
Galileo’s Middle Finger: This is Galileo’s middle finger, the actual thing! Kind of sick but at the same time I’d like to touch it.   It looks like a raisin.
The Middle Finger.com: Well, not so informative, but the name is just such that I have to include it.  You can submit your own middle finger pictures here!

Reincarnation Station

Hello kids, today we’re going to be discussing the widely under-discussed topic of reincarnation.  I do not claim to believe in such an odd anomaly, yet wish to delve into it with a wetted curiosity for such an interesting topic.  Hold onto your jimmies, this is going to be educational as hell.

The belief of reincarnation was originally discussed in Eastern religions by our buddies, the Hindus and the Buddhists.  The belief has been reincarnated with different views in New Age religions such as Tom Cruises’ Scientology.   The belief of reincarnation holds that one’s body will decompose while their soul will continue to life within another body and has lived before in other bodies/forms.   In layman’s, you start out as a human get trucked by the drunk taxi driver on 31^st and wake up a few seconds later scratching your tail as a squirrel in Central Park.   Got it?
Now, the Hindus and the Buddhists believed that this whole reincarnation was perfectly normal, it was not however a good thing.  For one to reach Nirvana, one must escape the constant pattern of rebirth.  Stick with me guys.  Native Americans believe that they can’t eat certain animals, because it could be their ancestors. Our buddy, Tom Cruise, and his Scientologist characters believe in a bit less of a random reincarnation, believing that one’s actions in their current incarnation will effect what their soul is reincarnate within next.   Pretty much, don’t do anything astronomically bad or you’ll be reincarnated as George Bush’s son, and no one wants him as a father, which is an eighteen year term!
Now, here is my piece.  To the Easterners, how do you know when you’re going to reach Nirvana?  I mean, once this Nirvana is reached you are stuck in one body for eternity.  What happens if you’re stuck as a Barnum and Bailey’s elephant?  It’s simple, you’re fucked.   To you Natives, please eat your relatives.  They don’t want to be the animal anymore, they want to come back as a human and if they don’t take a fancy to human life, they can just kill themselves until they’re back in their animal of choice.   And finally, Tom Cruise, you’re rich and famous and have your own religion, why would you want to change into something else?  Do you fantasize about becoming an eagle or something?  Although that would be pretty awesome, I suggest you change your religion to where if you’re a good little boy, you’re allowed to chose your own animal, object, or whatever you would like to become.
In conclusion, reincarnation is full of holes and you can pretty much take it as you want to take it.  I chose to leave it in the fantasies of others.  Any thoughts from the peanut gallery?

What Happened to the Puppets?

Today, I was shocked with the realization that puppets are being removed from popularity in today’s media.   I think there are two main reasons for my feeling this way and my arrival at such a woeful conclusion.  The first reason, is that the primary media through which I was exposed to puppets was Sesame Street and lets face it, sadly, I’m a little too old and busy to loyally follow Sesame Street these days.  I’m not even completely sure that they still produce Sesame Street or if it has sadly digressed to re-runs.
I also recall, that when I was just a wee little lad there were always Muppets movies to submerge my senses in blissful hours of entertainment.  This was premium, clean, and original entertainment.  Has the world moved onto better things thanks to flashy CGI? Is bigger, shinier, and newer really better?  Does anyone care that it’s the Muppet Central websites’ twelve year anniversary?  I care! I would almost rather see a puppet version of Avatar, which would be twice as entertaining and cost about one thousand percent less to create.  Why do you have to waste money for the fancy new shit, when you could just use puppets?!?!  Come on people!
I will agree though, that it is hard to take a puppet seriously once you are beyond the age of six or maybe even ten for you late bloomers out there.   Due to that fact,  most recent puppet media is of a comical nature such as Crank Yankers or Team America: World Police.  What is the world of puppet entertainment coming to?  Are we going to see puppet porno next?  What happened to the puppets that taught us the alphabet and good manners?    Could a movie with an all puppet cast experience success in today’s filth filled box office with out the filth?

My First Post, Oh dang!

Hello! to all of my non-existent readers!   My name is Seth Meredith and I’m writing this awesome blog now.  I have been cursed with countless hours of free time, that plague me with chronic boredom.    This blog is not however just something I’m writing because I’m bored and have too much free time.  I want to prove a point that you can make a popular blog just by being interesting and consistant.  I’m really crossing my fingers at the moment and this will definitely be a learning experience for me.  haha  This is probably going to be the most boring post of my blog.  In conclusion, this blog is about whatever I feel like writing about that I believe you, the reader will find entertaining.  This blog is going to be very quirky and unconventional as I believe this best reflect me and by being me I can provide you with the best quality of entertainments even if you don’t learn a damn thing from my blog, I promise you will smile, even if it’s just a little tiny baby smile.  :)


EDIT************This link will only take you to the old site, the new link is www.sethmeredith.blogspot.com
I have a sweet short domain sethmeredith.tk , make sure that you all refresh at least 5 times so I get enough views to keep that shit for free, haha.